I really hate Jon & Kate.

Never met them and undoubtedly never will. Still hate them.

I think I probably hate the kids too - all 8 of them. Not completely sure on that point though, they seem ok on the TV show however if they are the spawn of the aforementioned Jon & Kate - I hate them.

You see all the over-exposure in the media has really pissed me off. Up until just a few weeks I had never even heard of these people - not until the press had made it their primary goal to report on these peoples' every monotonous movement.

So now I think that I pretty much know every detail about this horribly dysfunctional family and unfortunately that is way too much information for my liking.

The reason I am bringing this up today is we just had a long weekend where they had a Jon & Kate 'marathon' playing episode after episode on TV of this horrible, mindless tripe.

I was over at my folks place on Sunday evening for dinner and Dad commented that he was both happy & relieved that Mom had actually found a few minutes away from the TV to throw a dinner together as she had been 'glued in front of the damn TV watching that crap for most of the day.'

Actually my mother watches the show (Jon & Kate plus 8) religiously each week. It is apparently one of her favourites for some reason that I cannot comprehend, as I always thought of Mom as being pretty smart.

These days however Mom is not so fond of the show now that Jon & Kate are getting a divorce and the family will be split up.


"Those poor young children" Mom lamented after the marathon had ended. "Whatever will they do without both parents being around them? They need a strong family at their impressionable ages."

I really didn't have the heart to tell her that the show is almost all completely fake. I mean, c'mon:

• the show is filmed in advance and they are hinting at divorce but fail to actually file until the same day as the show is aired - coincidental timing indeed!
• in-laws of the family have been stating for months that incidents, activities and even dialogue is scripted in order to deliver a consistently interesting program to the viewer each week
• they actually did TV promos about 'changes' weeks before the divorce show or even mention of a possible separation
• in the divorce papers filed by Kate, it claims she and husband Jon have been living "separate and apart" for at least two years, yet that is not what they portrayed on their show

That should give almost anyone a clue that 'what they see is not entirely the truth'. So much for the 'reality' portion of reality television.

The parents are making some sweet cash of reportedly around $70k each per show....the kids make dick, nada, diddley...even though they are the core reason everyone tunes in and also they do a lot of announcing & openings on the show.

So even though all these 'supposed problems' are going on, the show has been picked up for a couple more seasons. Lets hope they go towards a new direction and become remotely truthful, or at the very least - more interesting.

If they are looking for a few new ideas to get started, how about:

• now single, Jon returns home from his upscale New York bachelor apartment accompanied by his new girlfriend Bambi, the crack whore. He immediately attempts to convince the children that Kate is dead and Bambi is their new mother. Between Bambi's street smarts & savvy disposition only hilarity can ensue.
• a cross-over show with the caustic Judge Judy who gives them 10 minutes in her court to agree on how to divide the marital assets and children. Any complaints or back talk from the outspoken hag, Kate, is to be swiftly dealt with by Byrd (the bailiff) who will open up a can of 'whoop-ass' on her sorry, middle-aged self
• Jon actually grows a spine (and a pair) and is no longer acting like the subservient houseboy - Hop-sing, as he has in the previous seasons and finally stands up to the domineering shrew Kate.
• The show hires Octomom, Nadya Suleman and changes the name to John, Kate & Octoqueen plus 16

I mean none of these are terribly brilliant ideas however each one is far more entertaining then the fake crap we are seeing today. I am sure each of you reading this could also come up with some good suggestions for the show.

So enough of this phoney, staged and rehearsed 'so-called' reality show.

If I wanted to watch fake crap with people yelling, arguing and fighting, I would tune into wrestling or even worse, start following politics.

So I'm just a little curious here today. What would you do if you had a fifty year old neighbour who:

• rarely worked at all within the past ten years
• always walked around wearing masks and bizarre costumes and uniforms
• continually hung around under aged boys and frequently invited them for sleepovers to his home
• altered his appearance dramatically as a result of multiple cosmetic surgeries
• had numerous legal suits against him over unpaid bills as a result of his egotistical attitude & sense of entitlement
• had multiple allegations about him for child molestation
• settled out of court on sexual allegations made by at least one, possibly more, under aged boys
• had doll collections and the skeletal remains of a human in his house as keepsakes
• was well known to be a habitual prescription drug offender
• was known to sleep in a hyperbaric oxygen chamber so, as he claimed, he could live to be 150 years old
• lived with a pet chimpanzee who he named Bubbles and asserted that this animal was his best friend and also cleaned his bedroom

I am guessing you would be rather happy if this kind of freak left your neighbourhood pretty quickly or at the very least feel relieved once he was gone. Well that is essentially what happened as Michael Jackson died last week.

So how come everyone is sad or at least pretending to be? Why is it that when you die all the bad crap you perpetrated while living, is immediately forgotten?



Of course it is sad when a father of 3 young children passes away suddenly, but honestly - that is life. This kind of thing happens every day in our world.

I am hoping people remember the complete picture of Michael Jackson, both good and bad, and not just believe the crap coming from these absurd benefit concerts and memorials that all the 'blind sheep with short memories' have.

Sure you can use the anecdotal argument that thousands of people still loved him and were still buying tickets for his next set of concerts in London.

My only retort to that is Jackson had not had a hit whatsoever in over a decade and believe me when I tell you that nobody, with the exception of 'other freaks living in the past', wants to watch a 50 year old man grabbing his crotch on stage.

He may have been a talented man with a somewhat pleasant singing voice however that in no way should erase the many eccentric, immoral and illegal things this guy did in life. Lets not continue to eulogize this guy, he was no hero in any sense of the word but rather, just an entertainer with many abnormal habits. Nothing more and nothing less.

I really hate the fact that in death, either his or anyone else's, all of a sudden absolves you from any wrongdoings you may have done while on this earth. Ridiculous.

So go buy his CD's and download his songs if you enjoyed his music, but really, lets keep everything in perspective.

If you are thinking I am speaking cold & harsh on this topic, you're right - I am. Those were some harsh things he did while alive. Yes, yes - very sad, he's gone...blah blah blah. Ok, lets move on - get over it.

Now its time for a few shots of Jesus Juice.