Hey Joe

Joe Biden. Joe Six-pack. Joe the Plumber. My God, is there anyone living down in the USA that is actually NOT named Joe ?

As a Canadian citizen with neither the knowledge nor the right to comment on the US election, here I go with an outsiders view looking in.

For me things really got interesting after the third debate and I was over at my folks place one early evening just as the nightly news ended. Dad had just shut off the television after a political story and muttered aloud something to the effect of "I'll be damn glad when that election is over down in the States so we can get back to regular news and not all this political crap, I'm getting sick of hearing about it."

"Well it will be over soon." I replied smugly. "It is too bad your candidate, 'the old guy' is going to get beat and beat bad. I think he knows it too, his temper is starting to show quite frequently lately."

Dad looked at me for a moment and his reply to this (aside from the usual expected profanity) really shocked me.

"For your information Mr. Dumbass" Dad began. "I am actually pulling for Obama and not McCain. I have followed US politics my entire life and I would like to think myself as being quite informed on the candidates. Why did you think that I was supporting Senator McCain anyway?"

I wanted to somehow soften the true answer which was "because you're both old" however before I could think of a nice way to 'frame' this response, my father continued.

"Probably because both McCain & myself are around the same age, I'd wager." Dad speculated, giving me the evil eye as he did so.

"Well Boy, your wrong. Dead wrong. That is one of the reasons I would NOT vote for him, had you taken the damn time to ask my opinion before you shot off your mouth."

I could see at this point that Dad was not really upset at all but rather pleased he now had a platform to express his views on politics. I know my Mother refuses to speak to him on many subjects (which is a good thing, believe me), and politics is definitely high on her list. I thought I would be the good son this evening by patiently listening to his viewpoint.

"Why Dad?" I asked, encouraging his furthered response.

"It is common sense." Dad responded. "As a man gets old, he begins to lose a step or two in life. You see it all the time with sports players. They can no longer make the plays or score the goals which a younger version of themselves could."

"With businessmen and politicians it's a little harder to tell since their work is not a physical display but rather a mental one. I just think old John McCain is a good man but at 72 years old and a history of melanoma, he has passed his shelf life to be president."

"He's still pretty clever though, let me tell you. Picking that 'woman' from Alaska as a running mate was pure genius. Best insurance policy he can get. No one would dare try and assassinate McCain if she was the one waiting in the wings to take over. HAHA! Genius, reminds me of old George Bush Sr. when he picked that Quayle character. Worked like a charm!"

Opie, Andy & Richie and Fonzie
talk about the 2008 election

"Wow" I thought to myself. This is scary. Both my father and myself are thinking exactly alike and in 100% agreement on the highly controversial topic of politics. Amazing, definitely a first.

Growing up, I have always had many disagreements with my father on points of view. Mom says all boys and their fathers are like that and eventually we grow into being the same. Both father and son's views change over the years. I am not sure if this is true however as I say, we were on the same page on this topic.

My opinion on the subject is essentially you are not voting specifically for the one candidate running for president but rather the 'tag-team' of both the president and vice-president, since in theory anyway, the vice-president should be equally capable of taking over the duties at anytime.

When you compare these two 'tag-teams', it seems pretty clear that Obama-Biden is the true choice. If Biden needed to step up and be the president, he is intelligent, experienced and most of all capable of doing so. I sadly do not think that the MILF (yeah, I know, I almost got in trouble using that term before - check it out HERE ) is anywhere near being Presidential material in any way.

No, that would be a joke. And every time I see Palin and McCain together reminds me of years ago seeing Anna Nicole Smith and her elderly billionaire husband J. Howard Marshall. Not a pretty picture, believe me.

Also, McCain and the MILF seem more concerned with attacking their opponents on a personal level rather then dealing with the problems that the average American family faces today. Even their view of an 'average' American is skewed by parading around some guy named 'Joe the Plumber'.

My brother-in-law Doug, A.K.A. 'the dullest man in the world', is a plumber and they make a pretty good living from what I have seen. He has full benefits, no mortgage, 4 weeks a year holiday and overall a pretty good lifestyle in comparison to most (including myself). He happily spends a couple of weeks each winter down in Mexico undoubtedly boring the locals down there as much as he does here in Calgary.

My father often says to me 'you should learn a real trade like Doug, instead of this computer stuff. They will always need plumbers. It's a good trade.' Oh well at least Dad has finally stopped comparing computers with 8-track players. But I seem to have gotten off topic somewhat!

Now where was I, oh yes, I was cutting down people and throwing rocks!

And what about that Palin calling herself an 'average Hockey Mom' and then we find out she spent $150,000 bucks on clothing and make-up. $150,000.00, that's insane!

Every Hockey Mom I have ever seen down at the rink or dropping of their kid is generally dressed 'less than glamorously' usually in sweats and running shoes. So once again I need to say that their view on 'average' just ain't even close to most people's reality.

I feel I also need to address those that they are polling that consider themselves as still being 'undecided' in this election.

Are they polling the mentally retarded? This thing has been going on for a couple years now with thousands of interviews, hundreds of candidate appearances and town halls, published documentation and even three nationally televised debates. If you still are undecided, and keep in mind the election is only a couple weeks away from now, you probably should not vote at all. You are undoubtedly a simpleton who finds this whole election 'business' perhaps a little too overwhelming.

I mean What more can they possibly tell you for you to decide? What do you need to hear - specifically? Unless you are Pavlov's dog (waiting for a particular bell tone to occur) that will magically give you some epiphany you need to have your awakening & decide, perhaps you should take a pass on this one and just don't vote at all. Maybe accept the fact you are just a little challenged and then go have a lie down and continue to drool on yourself in peace and quiet.

And for my last point, I am typing this entry in green type today to show all those 'backward thinkers' out there (you know, the few with their values still squarely back in the early 1800's) that actually believe 'race' is an issue.

As you can see, color doesn't matter at all. It's the message that counts. That's always the most important.

Anyway you shouldn't look at it that you are voting for the 'old white guy' or the 'black guy' but rather, just 'the guy'.

The guy that is best for the economy. The guy that is best for the people. The guy that is best for the country. You know that 'Obama guy' !!

But seriously, I think the US election this year is an extremely important one for all American citizens and also the rest of the world. The decisions you make on Tuesday November 4th will be a very important one for yourselves and your families.

The choice itself is simple, as I see it. You can either choose to make history or choose to repeat it. I am hoping the choice is obvious.

Ok, that's it. Thanks for listening to this 'damn foreigners' two-cents worth on politics. I would guess right now that you are thinking that two-cents is still way too expensive - and you are probably right!


Shawie said...

I agree... I can't vote yet but I'm here in the US now. My husband & I had always this heated argument about politics, especially Palin, grrrrr! I just don't get it, why they say- they can relate to her?! damn! it would end up a disaster, truly I'm scared!

Da Old Man said...

By the way, my name is Joe (really) and I'm an American. From what I have seen of Obama's politics, he will probably destroy the economy of our country, and most of the world will be plunged into a depression.
I've studied politics and economics for about 30 years. Wish us luck no matter who wins.

Anonymous said...

I'll have to somewhat agree with da old man. We are screwed either way because events have been in motion for a long time. When Alan Greenspan admits to a mistake you know you're in for an economic beating. However, I will be voting for Obama because I think both McCain and Palin are too concerned with their image or just getting elected to effectively realize the mess the country and world for that matter are waist deep in. Either way McCain or Obama it will take a very long time to get things back on track...that is if they are not screwed up even more.

Anonymous said...

I look at it differently. The economy is screwed, education is on the slide and with two wars, I don't thik the foreign policy situation is any better. It cannot get much worse. But which of the two offers a glimmer of hope?

Whoever wins the day will need a full country behind him, and the campaign has become so divisive (real versus something Americans) that this will be difficult.

Anonymous said...

Being a silent spectator until now I think , I agree with you. Thanks for sharing a very analytical post. Cheers.

Anonymous said...

I always love hearing from people who are outside of the US when it comes to our elections, one reason is they can just sit back ignore all the hype and get the good information. The other is weather we want to admit it or not electing a leader effects not just the US but the world. The same goes with any other democracy.

You make some great points here and I hope many US citizens read this and learn a few things.

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately, as an American, I can tell you that the two major candidates are both going to continue with the same conservative corporate and war mongering policies that Bush has been ramming down our throats. They just have a marketing campaigns that tell us they're going to change things. And it doesnt help when people are stuck discussing whether one guys too old or the others got too funny of a name or if the VP is an utter imbecile. The issues get ignored and we continue to get royally fucked.

Erik said...

I voted, but not for either of the two mainstream candidates. I hope they let us into Canada soon.

tashabud said...

I know I'll get pummelled here, but I beg to differ. The reason I'm not going to vote for Obama is because he had aligned himself with people who I think don't have the interest of America at heart. To watch and listen to Rev. Wright's hateful speech against America and to learn of Ayer's terrorist activities against America are so ingrained in my my mind that they override anything and everything in this campaign. I'm like a mother who's protective of her child. In this case, I'm very protective of America. And anyone who have aligned himself or herself with people who don't have America's interest at heart, is bad news for America. And don't tell me that I should not judge people by association because that's not gonna fly with me. I can understand if the association was a long time ago, when he was just a teenager, but we're talking about long associations that were only terminated because the associations were exposed, which would ultimately had crushed any hopes of survival for his presidential aspirations if not terminated. These are the deciding factors for me and not the economy or socialism, even though these are also important issues to me.


Anonymous said...

The line about Palin being McCain's best insurance policy is one of the funniest things I've read this election! I'll be chuckling over that all day. Thanks! :)

Anonymous said...

Oh man, maybe I haven't been paying enough attention each time your blog scrolls through BlogExplosion, but this is the first time I realized that you're from Canada -- and I've never had a five martini lunch! Anyway, keep up the funny my good sir.

Anonymous said...

Awesome...as a girl living in the southern US, I totally agree.

Reverend Loy said...

Dang, I didn't even know that Andy Griffith was still alive!

Anonymous said...

I ignore it all. It doesn't matter who wins. People like to pretend it does, but it doesn't.

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